Bert

I saw an epitaph with a single name,
all it said was ‘Bert’, engraved, just ‘Bert’.
What is wrong with being named ‘Bert’?
Why is it such a social issue? Why is Bert

so evil?

Usually poetry has some kind of form or rhyme or meter.
or whatever — but poems about Bert have no such structure.
Bert, an evil entittty, can proceed ‘Willy Nilly’, a song about
whales that he likes to bring up often.

so evil.

Like I say, his gravestone has been carved here for anyone
to come and see (before bedtime for little babies). Like I say,
we used to share an apartment together for ages. Rubber Ducky?
We used to have a Rubber Ducky. Where is that now, Bert?

Where did you put it? Meter and rhyme?

so evil!