Sunday, April 19, 2009

Ghost Story II

This is part 2 of a Ghost Story. Part 1 is here. Then Part 3, with lesbians. Part 4 is here. Part 5. Part 6.

"Ehud, why don't you close up here and buy me a calzone?" asked Peter.

"Ok Peter," said Ehud peering into his CRT, "let me just write back this quick reply to Bobby."

"You still writing to that kid? How do you find the time?"

Ehud let out a sigh and then went on typing. "It's hard. I mean, it's not like I'm being paid for this."

"If only this was your day job," said Peter. "Finding ghosts so you can speak to the little chidren. Pervert."

"Listen to this - I mean, how are you supposed to respond to this crap? Listen:" said Ehud, adjusting his glasses.

"Dear Mr. Spengler (Peter snorted),

Thank you for your newsletter. I don't believe in blobs, but I believe in EVPs. I wrote a note to my mom to buy me a tape recorder so I can record EVPs while I'm playing my Solitaire. I'll turn off the volume so there's no interruptions with the beeps, in case.

I think, now, that I'm a ghost. Yesterday, I was watching Henry Tabitha get beaten up by the school bullies. I think he saw me, and when he did, there was this look of horror and fascination in his eyes (but no longing for comraderie, or friendship). So, I think I'm a ghost. The bullies don't even see me - sometimes, when they're beating people up, I try to run in the middle, to get beaten up, but they just ignore me.

Also, after that, walking home I caught up with Emma. She's fifteen, (I'm eight) but at least she talks to me. She said that things had been flying around in her house, and she said therefore I must be a Poltergeist. She said her mom told her not to walk home with me, but she was ok with it, and was doing this only to expand her horizons. I like her, but I wish I had some guy friends."

Peter spurted cola from his nostrils. "What the hell? Who is this guy?"

"Listen, it get's better," said Ehud. He readjusted his glasses:

"So now I think I am paranormal. Can you do some checks and find out if I am real? I would appreciate it very much. I think there is a database of all people ever born in Wisconsin online, but when I read it, I'm not sure if I am imagining or not. Your help will be appreciated.


"What are you going to do, 'Spengler'?" asked Peter, wiping cola off his shirt with a book cover. He looked at the cover (Investigations on True Pyramid Architecture by one D. Lantiss Merman), shrugged, and then put it back on Ehud's desk.

"Well, what the hell am I going to do? I'm going to tell him he's real."

"Shouldn't you be calling his parents? I mean, aren't they the ones supposed to deal with this crap?"

"Tried," sighed Ehud. "I sent a letter, but no reply."

"Ehud, why don't you close this place down and buy me a calzone?" said Peter.

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