Saturday, February 15, 2014

Mind, body, soul. And gravy.

I once fell in love with someone.
Fell very deep. Type of thing was
between us, an energy of joined state.

I'm not talking physically
(don't get me wrong, there was physical stuff)
I'm talking about soul, about awareness.
About two entities melting into one.

It wasn't a pedestrian love.
You know, like some couples, sure,
maybe they might know each other so well
that they can even complete each others' sentences.

The one person knows exactly what the other is thinking.
But this was greater than that.
We were creating our own vocabularies,
our own languages! A deep regret is never having composed a dictionary!

Therein lies the rub. Maybe if there had been a dictionary
for this level of entanglement, we could have both read slowly together.
Known about any mistakes (all of them were by me) and pulled out a clean eraser
and rub them off. Together. My hand in her hand.

And if that had been the case, maybe we could finally smile at each other again.

But the truth is that I lost her. I mean, like, literally.
I don't know where she is, who she is or what she does anymore.
I fell into this deep psychosis where I'd start establishing a repertoire
and be famous at restaurants for ordering two plates.

The first I would eat normally.
And then the second...fuck. This is extremely difficult to write.
The second plate, I would eat also, but pretending to be her.
But where was she, really? What had I done so terrible

That she might disappear from the entire world?

Okay. Okay. Gonna stop here. Think I've shared too much.

Have a nice Sunday.

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